All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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