Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
This baby is an asshole
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
