so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize