So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
