In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
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