morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
