? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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