i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
