At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
