i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
