Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize