my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
