My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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