his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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