I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
