There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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