if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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