Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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