her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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