Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Someone shit on the floor
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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