I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Randomize
