I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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