Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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