just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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