I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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