Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
