Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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