He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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