Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
