Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
