Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
