Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
