Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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