walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Success! We fucked roommates!
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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