I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
