Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
