my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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