did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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