i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
