I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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