oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
