dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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