We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
