If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
