I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
