Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
There's always time for handjobs
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
