The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
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