420 ftw
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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