I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
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