I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
